The boss was unhappy with me. I had pushed aside my own deadline-driven work to help a colleague who was in a jam. To my mind, I had done exactly what she had requested. But apparently I had made her uncomfortable because I wasn’t upbeat enough when I did the work. My boss told me it wasn’t enough to do the work; I needed to be happy about it — and I wasn’t allowed to tell people “no.” But the ability to say “no” is crucial in order to get your own work done.